In this modern age, we all agree that if you are new to BDSM, there is nothing to be ashamed of. But it’s okay if you’re still wondering, “Is it normal for my girlfriend to hit me?” Yes, it is, especially if your partner is being kinky. Although buying kink accessories and sex toys can be fun, this kind of play is ultimately about you, your partner(s), and equal exchange of power, not capitalism. In reality, BDSM costs nothing. A lot of it is psychological in nature. If you are looking for a spanking game, many people believe that hands are still superior to any toy and are also free. Even various everyday objects, such as ropes and clothespins, can be used in scenes and cost nothing. But how can BDSM help you and your partner spice things up? Here are eight ways to experience BDSM with your lover, from safe bondage to role play.
Be Open With Your Partner
In BDSM, being dominant and submissive refer to voluntary power exchange. This means that rules have been negotiated and agreed upon in advance by all parties involved, even if a subordinate partner is bound and the dominant partner controls what happens in a scene. Since the dominant partner has to respect the submissive boundaries at all times, it can also be assumed that the submissive has control. Make sure that you and your partner agree on everything that will happen before trying something new. Consider using a safety phrase to stop the game if necessary. The pleasure of BDSM is in discovering your own urges and limits (and those of your partner), and planning the encounter in advance can already be a kind of foreplay.
Explore Your Wild Side With Dirty Talks
Are you a submissive person who likes to be criticized? Do you want to hear that you are a bad girl who follows your father’s orders? Ask your partner to use profanity with you. BDSM-related swearing can be used by anyone, regardless of their position in the relationship (dominant, submissive, or switch). It is possible to express your desires through dirty words. Verbal cues can also help visualize hot fantasies. Let’s say you have a fantasy about being tied up. Still, right now, you just want to feel your partner tie you up and use you (consensually), or you just want to experience how they address you by calling them “sir.” You can explore your fantasies through a dirty talk before you put them into practice.
Learn the Orgasm Control
Orgasm control, especially for a person with a penis, is sometimes called “edging” and involves stimulating the person until they are about to orgasm, stopping abruptly and then repeating as needed. If you are learning to control your orgasms, you surely already know that delaying gratification can make the reward even more pleasurable. To experience orgasm control, it is not necessary to stick to a strict regimen. Relax and give your dominant partner permission to control your orgasm if you are the submissive partner. When you approach climax, ask him to use his lips or a sex object and stop just before you reach orgasm. When you cannot wait any longer, ask him to help you cross the finish line to achieve the most intense orgasm you have ever had.
Get Familiar With the Ropes
The main theme of many BDSM scenes is bondage. Bondage can begin after you and your partner has discussed which acts are acceptable when one of you is tied up (this might include spanking, nipple biting, and oral sex) and which acts are not (perhaps you are not so keen on spitting or slapping). Make sure you can untie the knot or bondage when you are ready. You can also try laying it on your skin to prevent it from clumping and restricting blood flow. If you are using a rope, it is good to have safety scissors handy, so you can easily cut the rope if a knot gets caught.
So what’s the bottom line? BDSM scenes are a great way to spice up your sex life with your partner. But keep in mind that both of you are completely into it. That’s why you need to talk with your partner about it and set the mood before getting started. Follow these tricks above, and who knows, you’ll become a BDSM master and get the best orgasm ever.…